lets get together before we get much older

Listening to a Bic Runga track released when I was seven (just a baby), it's comforting. I want to gather the beautiful, the familiar and the well-treaded to me and just burrow in. I feel kind of lost and aimless and stupid, running around without a clue, blindly, ridiculously. Things I'm currently kind of concerned about:

• School. Still have no idea what I wanna do. Mon offered me a scholarship for anything in the Education faculty, something that made me pause but not stop. I'll just be an ordinary Commerce student after all. I'm so confused, there's three more days to change my preferences and I'm JUST NOT SURE.
  
  
• I think I'm working too much. I do get days off occasionally but they're few and in-betwixt long, long shifts and irritating hours. And it's Christmas, and I do want to stay, so, y'know, gotta stick with it. I'm just so sick of being nice and I have a messed up sleep/food schedule now that I can never figure out.
  
  
• Sometimes I still see your face, just a flash, in the street.
  
  
• Old history teacher who resigned mid-term Two this year has apparently been charged for possession of child pornography. I'm kind of shocked and a little bit sad, because I thought he was a really decent guy. Kind of can't reconcile the man and the madness.
  
  
• Was on a semidate with this guy I know, not sure how I feel about it all. He was kind of annoying throughout - kept comparing me to this guy I really dislike and throwing out insinuations about aforementioned annoying guy. Felt kind of crappy at the end of it - spending three hours in bad company is hardly fun. Dunno what to think... I mean, why ask me out if you're just going to antagonize me? D from work thinks he's just a dickhead, but L thinks that it may just be nerves.
  
  So not sure what to do with that, but at least I can DO something about that, as opposed to the other dot points. I s'pose follow L's advice, let it lie for a few weeks and then maybe catch up again to see if he's still a wanker.
  
  
• Miss my Mummy already :(